If you are struggling with your commitment to your relationship and wondering if it is worth the hardship then this is for you.
When you think about the first days of meeting and romancing with your partner they are probably heady with beautiful memories and laced with intimate unforgettable moments.
Compare that with now when you think about your partner and the thoughts are more about what they have not done which has evoked annoyance, such as no spontaneous occasions of pleasure or what they have done which you now wished they did not do, such as
complain about doing the dishes every other night.
It is important to realise that the early days are created with the added support of love hormones.
These hormones provide us with a bonding and a sense of knowing that this is the ‘one’ for us.
This in turn allows us to offer the commitment and make plans for the future with our beloved.
But these hormones fade with the passing of time. They become a distant memory and any comparison with the present is met with disappointment and nostalgia.
One of the ways of re-framing your memories of the early days of the relationship is to use it as a reminder that you did have the commitment and love. This means that if any issues are worked through to the point of understanding then you can have that same love again albeit in a more mature wholesome way.
Another thing to remember is that we chose our partners because life is bound to offer us challenges for us to learn and grow from. Living in such close proximity to the same person on an ongoing basis is bound to push us into our issues.
We choose our partners to get some life lessons in order for us to maximise our potential. Often if a stranger was to offer the same lesson we would turn our back and blame them without having to take any responsibility.
When we blame our partner the issue does not go away and we end up having to do some soul searching ourselves, which is the whole point of this article.
Once we are motivated to have a look on a deeper level at our psychology about what is happening then we have the opportunity to take responsibility. We get to learn how we are the creator of our own universe, the centre of our own mandala and everything is a part of our own creation for the benefit of our own journey.
It takes a lot of courage and perseverance to take the steps required. But the outcome of love and understanding is the most rewarding and exhilarating outcome you could ever experience.
To be able to let go of grudges on your partner and express gratitude for them being as they are is the most liberating thing possible.
Personal beach retreat on the Sunshine Coast, offers deluxe retreats personalised to your individual needs. We can facilitate your emotional journey with privarte counselling to awaken insights and clarity in order to live a more vibrant empowered life.
We look forward to hosting your retreat.
Holistic Counsellor at Beach Health Retreat